After reflecting on yesterday’s revelations from Microsoft, the grades return today to focus on Nintendo’s yearly press conference. After crushing the souls of hardcore gamers everywhere with last year’s event, let’s see if the big ‘N’ managed to rebound this year.
Montages
Nintendo apparently loves montages. They used them for the lion’s share of the transitions in their press conference. Aside from being a device that was last really effective in bad 80s movies, none of these montages really showed anything interesting. All we saw was a variety of types of people holding some form of Nintendo product. If montages must be used Nintendo, follow the Sony montage method and show nothing but game footage. At least that way I’ll be able to keep from giving parts of your presentation a ‘C-’.
New Super Mario Brothers Wii
Nintendo debuted a new 2D Mario Brothers game at their press conference, with the notable addition of an interesting multiplayer mechanic. It’s the classic 2D platforming everyone, hardcore gamers included, can love, with up to three other players simultaneously. The live gameplay demo looked like a lot of fun, and I get the feeling the game also works as a single player experience. It’s Mario, it’s 2D, and it’s part multiplayer or coop. Nothing in there not to love as far as I’m concerned. I have no qualms with the holiday 2009 release date either. ‘A-’
Cammie
I won’t lie, Cammie has a history of not being my favorite E3 press conference participant. This year didn’t help her cause much. While she did drop the ultra peppy persona she had last year, she certainly isn’t a person I want to associate with Nintendo. Also, she dressed like a giant marshmallow for the press conference today. If she had accessorized properly, she could have resembled a wiimote. Either that, or she borrowed some of MC Hammer’s pants. Good thing they cut out the parachuting portion of her enterance. Finally, she managed to come in last out of the four players during the New Super Mario Brothers live demo, so I wasn’t wowed by her gaming prowess either. Sorry Cammie, but it’s a ‘D’ for you.
Wii Fit Plus
We were also introduced to Wii Fit Plus at the Nintendo event, because apparently last year’s game apallingly failed to stem the American obesity crisis. If you saw Wii Fit, add a few more mini games, and you’ve basically got Wii Fit Plus. I’ve docked points for lack of originality, but I will award points for making both a bundle and the software only available. At least Nintendo is attempting a considerate cash grab when they release it this fall. Still, I was generally unimpressed, so I award it a ‘C-’.
Wii Motion Plus
Well, it’s been a while since this controller add on was announced for the Wii. And to show off the technology we saw … another Wii Sports Resort demo. Apparently the game starts with a ski diving introduction to help teach people how to use the new control scheme. Cammy’s wardrobe suddenly made more sense, apparently no one told her only the Miis wre participating. Bill and Reggie demonstrated the archery and 3 point contest minigames. It looks a lot like the original Wii Sports, except with new minigames. I’m sure it will sell by the truckloads when it is released on July 26, but my excitement will really depend on the still unannounced pricepoint. Some third party titles were also discussed as Wii Motion Plus titles; such as Tiger Woods 10, Grand Slam Tennis, Virtua Tennis, and Red Steel 2. Red Steel 2 can only be played with Wii Motion Plus, and will come bundled with the add on in order to give it any chance of selling. Overall, we didn’t really see anything too new or revolutionary from Wii Motion Plus, so I’ll give it a ‘C’.
Ad-libbing
Bill and Reggie seemed to go off script for a bit during their Wii Sports Resort demo. Let’s just say they should stick with their day jobs. If their attempted “banter” wasn’t ad-libbed, they need to fire their writers, ASAP. Show me the games gentlemen, leave the comedy to professionals, or you’ll end up with an ‘F’.
RPGs
After his demo and brief stand-up career, Reggie spoke about some upcoming RPG titles on Nintendo platfroms. He talked briefly about the Wii exclusive Final Fantasy Chronicles: The Crystal Bearers, and showed a brief trailer. We were then treated to a trailer for Kingdom Hearts 358/2 Days on DS, which will be releasing on 29/9 in a battle of improper fractions (that’s 9/29 for our North American readers). Neither of these games were new announcements. Reggie then announced two new DS RPGs, Mario and Luigi, Bowser’s Inside Story, and Golden Sun DS. The spiritual successor to the Mario RPG series will release this fall, while no date was listed for Golden Sun DS. This segment gets and up and down grade. On one hand, we heard about two games we already knew about, but on the other hand we learned about two new titles, including one that revitalises an old Nintendo franchise. After considering everything, I give this segment a ‘C+’.
DS Game Soup
Cammie snuck back out onstage during the montage transition, apparently having escaped the backstage s’more cookout unscathed. She returned to announce three new DS games for a variety of audiences. Revealed were Womens Murder Club, Games of Passion, which appears to be an Ace Attorney type game based on the prose styling of James Patterson; COP: The Recruit, a driving action game; and Style Savvy, a game for 12 year old girls featuring shopping and runway walkoffs that would but Hansel to shame. While these were all new games, I was bored to tears by this point, and only sort of half paying attention. As a result, Nintendo’s grade will drop here a bit, I’ll give them a ‘C’.
DSi
After yet another montage and the obligatory sales stats, we arrived at the segment for Nintendo’s newest forced upgrade attempt in the handheld space, DSi. Some new software was announced for the DSiware downloadable service; Flip Note Studio is a simple movie editor, Mario vs Donky Kong: Minis March Again is a puzzler, and Wario Ware DIY is a microgame creator. The ability to upload pictures from the DSi cameras to facebook was also announced, making the DSi less useful for social networking than the average cell phone. The Legend of Zelda: Spirit Tracks was shown again, but there was no new information available for consumption. All in all, a few interesting DSiware utilities were revelaed, but that’s not enough to push the grade past a ‘C+’.
Wii Vitality Sensor
I’ll keep this brief. Iwata made an appearance on stage to reveal yet another Wii acessory, the Wii Vitality Sensor. Iwata offered no demonstration or potential applications of this yawn inspiring peripheral beyond the fact it might help people to relax. He accomplished exactly the opposite in his presentation, by causing me to bang my head repeatedly on my desk. If this were 2002, and it were an accessory for Eternal Darkness, maybe I’d bite. For actually raising my stress level, I’m giving this silly piece of plastic an ‘F’.
Super Mario Galaxy 2
After the ringing in my ears from the previous revelation stopped, I noticed Cammie “Too legit to quit” Dunaway returned to the stage. This time, I ended up being a-ok with that fact, because she came out to announce a new 3D Mario game. A trailer ran, featuring scenes that included Yoshi. The screen revealed this new title to be Super Mario Galaxy 2, which woke up even the hardcore gamers in the room. The trailer looked great, although no release date was hinted at. For revealing a game people actually wanted, I’ll give out an ‘A-’.
3rd Party Titles
Reggie then returned to the stage to jump up and down and scream, “Look guys, 3rd parties actually develop games for Wii! Really we swear! Look, we brought some!” Unfortunately, none of the games he was talking about were new reveals. The Conduit, Resident Evil: The Darkside Chronicles, and Dead Space: Extraction are all previously announced games. They all seemed to look graphically solid for Wii titles, but there was really no news here. For showing us nothing new, I’ll give a ‘D’.
Metroid: Other M
And then, just for fun, Reggie dropped a bomb on the audience, announcing Metroid: Operation M. This new title is a collaboration between the big ‘N’ and Tecmo’s Team Ninja, of Ninja Gaiden fame. The trailer that played looked fantastic, and featured what appeared to be a voiced Samus Aran. It was revealed that the game would release sometime in 2010. That one moment captured the attention of everyone, and showed that Nintendo might actually care slightly about it’s hardcore fans out there that grew up on franchises like Metroid. This seems to hold a lot of promise, and was a complete surprise as an announcement. For being a genuinely surprising and exciting moment, I’ll give it an ‘A’.
Overall
Nintendo offered a very up and down press conference this year, which I suppose is an improvement from it’s mostly flat “Look at how great we are” event of last year. While there were some obvious duds such as the Wii Vitality Sensor and long stretches where the audience appeared to be asleep, there were also several instances of genuine excitement and surprise. Still, Nintendo was definitely found wanting in comparison to the Microsoft event from the day before, which featured games, games, and more games until they announcement of Natal, which essentially out Wiis the Wii. The two new Mario titles and Metriod: Other M were clearly the highlites for the gamers of my ilk, and they saved this event from being a repeat of last year’s disaster. I’m grading this one out just above average, because despite the lack of continually great news, several titles were announced for the hardcore gamer audience, which is much better than last year’s showing. Overall, I’m giving Nintendo a ‘C+’, but there is certainly still room for improvement.
Maybe Nintendo will raise it’s game next year, if they can scramble out their money pool long enough to do a press conference.
Sigh.
